Making an album- the holistic process

Here's news for ya... I didn't grow up making music, nor did I ever even dream of being a singer/songwriter/guitar player- none of that.

I played snare drum in the school band (P-SEC!!), and I was into acting. I wrote billions of stories, but it seemed far fetched for me to be a writer, living in Savannah. I joined the army, got out, and came to ATL, going to school to be a either an artist manager ( I did "manage" India for sec LOL), a sound engineer, or maybe direct videos- shit, somethin creative.

The point in telling you that is that I found my musical gift as an adult. By the time I realized that this was something I could do for a living, I had been using it as a therapeutic process for the better part of my life, so it's not something I do JUST for fun, or money. I write when I feel the overwhelming need to be creative, and I feel like I have NO other way to express something. 9 times out of 10, my explanation for why I wrote a song is so piss poor, you'll wish you'd never asked, LMAO! Try listening to me explain "cheatin man". It don't work- that's why I wrote a song about it. But sometimes it takes a while, because I turn things around a thousand times before I release it. I have to feel like I captured it, but didn't kill it.

And I'm saying THAT to say, as I embark on this new record, I'm in the phase of my life, and career (did I just say career? that still sounds strange to me) in which I'm more aware of the term CRAFT. The gift is there, it's the craft that takes an artist to the next level. I've become aware of it more ever since I released my first record, but it's been mostly related to singing. Again, as a person who didn't sing all my life, it was all raw emotion really, and my voice is more linked to what I'm saying more than vocal prowess. Still, the craft part came, in using different tones and voices to better illustrate what I'm saying, or for variety to keep folks interested. A nice falsetto note from time to time, or a vocal run is good to hit people in the heart, and either regain someones attention, or just let you know I CAN SANG- people like a showoff sometimes, I've learned. So I had to learn that I can't smoke (as much), can't drink (as much), I have to rest my voice, meaning, I can't be hollerin in the club (which is EVERY conversation in the club), so it's best that I just not go to clubs, especially where there's smoke. All of this, just so I can sound halfway decent at shows. I can get away with some things that some people can't, and some people can do things, I would never dream of, and still sing circles around me.

So imagine what it's like when WRITING material that's related to your life. You may run across things that you are afraid to say, you may run across things that you are ASHAMED to say, you might be vocally off one day because you didn't take proper care of yourself, you may just not feel like saying anything. I feel a duty to give people an overall good feeling, the feeling that whatever they're getting is made with care and concern for their experience. I hate listening to something that just feels- blah. Someone singing about something they know absolutely nothing about, or worse, to know that they are flat out LYING. The only appeal then, is to be amazed at how vivid their imagination is, cuz I listen to some rappers like, "damn, he sounds like he really believes this shit!! Maybe he's just more crafty than I am!"

So for me, the craft comes full circle to being more crafty at LIFE. I've written about some of my flaws, I'm more interested in correcting them than making them sound good in a song. I know I'll never be perfect, nor am I interested in being that (booooring) , but this process is showing me that there are a few things that I should all out CHANGE. I'm not religious at all, but religious folks know the feeling I'm describing. Just like I have to protect my voice, if I wanna share my life with you, and I CARE about what I'm giving you, I have to LIVE BETTER-ugh, you people make me SICK LOL!! This means, without giving away more than necessary( Iownknow yall like THAT), I have to not live lies. We all lie (I'm certain of it, sometimes it's necessary), but -- well, YOU know. My favorite artists are those who have conviction, and at the very least can LIVE with themselves. This manifests itself in many forms, there are as many ways to live as there are people, but I know it when I see it, and that's what I'm attracted to as a listener. That's also what I want to share with you as a listener. That good shit. That's the craft.